opinion anyone?

ok so im not that far and if you dont feel like reading it or dont have the time its understandable but if you do read it please tell me what you thinkand be honest please!

World of Darkness

Chapter 1:

I walked silently towards the room Christine was staying. My katana gleamed in the moonlight. It was a nice katana, silvered blade, golden hilt, and red rupees the glowed live fire. I stepped silently to her door. I loved the power of darkness. I honed them for the sole purpose of stealth. It was an ancient magic practiced by the kingdom of darkness. I was one of the only ones who knew the secret of it and lived. As far as I knew the King of darkness, Dariun, and I were the only ones who knew that you were actually drawing power from the god of darkness himself and if you did your soul was his.
Unlike Dariun, I would have a chance to not have my soul eaten by pure darkness. Dariun made a deal with the God of Darkness, his soul for all eternity for an unstoppable army and immense power. I just called upon him to grant me Dark Magic. I may have a chance to save myself but not likely. I looked through the key hole and saw Christine sleeping in her bed. I ghost stepped through the wall into her room.
I stepped over to her bed and saw her beauty. She was, no doubt, the most beautiful woman I had ever seen. Too bad she was a ninja who had to die. I held the sword to her neck and before I could finish my job she jumped out of her bed with two katanas. “Ha, you’ve gotten slow, Christine.” I said smirking.
“We have a score to settle, Milo,” she said eyeing my katana. It was unfair, I thought. She was gorgeous and I was average. She was tall with long blonde hair and blue eyes and was developed more than most women. I was short with short brown hair and eyes. She charged at me, one katana aimed for my side the other for my neck. I did a flip over her and tried to stab her in her back, but she side stepped and swung both katanas at my head. I rolled to the side and lunged at her chest. She kicked me sideways into the wall and stabbed for my throat. I rolled between her legs and kicked her into the wall. She ran up it and stood on the roof.
I swung at her head but she blocked and swung at mine with her other katana. I ducked in time and I could feel the wind grazing my hair. She jumped down and we were five feet from each other. “Why didn’t you kill me that night, Christine?”
“It wasn’t my job to kill you,”
“You know that’s not it,” I said charging her. I muttered a few words and my katana caught on fire. It was a black fire but fire all the same. I swung for her side and she blocked, but when she swung for my side I jumped on her sword and kicked her in the face. It knocked her into the wall and she fell limp on the floor. Two guards rammed themselves through the door wielding swords and shields.
I flipped behind them and killed them both with a single horizontal strike. When I went over to finish my job, Christine was gone. I ran outside and she was flying away with someone on a giant bird. “Lord of Darkness. I call upon your powers to summon a beast of flight.” A bolt of lightning stuck the ground and a swirl of darkness came up from the ground. Out came a black dragon that looked to be made of stone. I jumped on its back and it flew at an amazing speed after Christine.
Within minutes I saw the bird and Christine. Her kidnapper stoop up and I saw him draw a bow. A burst of laughter erupted from my lips. An arrow came at my head and I easily grabbed it, but from nowhere another arrow struck me in the shoulder. Pain shot through my arm and chest. Suddenly I felt sick and fell to the ground hitting what seemed to be every branch on the tree I fell on. I saw night sky and then my vision went blurry. When I opened my eyes I was in a black void. Two giant red eyes and a mouth full of sharp white teeth appeared before me. It burst into laughter and my arm started hurting more and more. “It’s been a long time, Milo,” it said.
“Too short if you ask me,” I said pulling the arrow out of my shoulder. I knew my surroundings even though I was in a void. I wrapped my shoulder up and continued talking to the demon.
“Why? What’s wrong, Milo? Am I not fun anymore? Remember, I’m the only one saving your ass. Or do you want to go see the big boss,” it said smirking.
“How about I buy you dinner and you go home with me and not the other way around,” I said feeling for my katana.
“I would take you now, but I can’t. You see, the boss has a job for you. If you complete the job you keep your soul and continue calling on his power.”
“And if I don’t?” I asked feeling the hilt of my katana.
“Well, my favorite little ninja gets to come home with daddy,” It said bursting into laughter.
“I’ll take my chances. What’s the job?”
“Kill the king of darkness. It’s pretty easy if you ask me. I wanted to do it, but no, your punk ass gets it,” he looked sad, “But it’s not all bad. I get to watch you, even when you bathe.”
“Tell the boss I said yes,” I said slicing him in half and when I finally came back to reality I was in a think forest. One look at a tree I knew where I was. The trees were twenty feet wide and tall enough to make a dragon look small. The Forest of the Ancient Race had been around before the Ancient Race. Only they knew the secret behind the forest. What really pissed me off though was that the trees were a magical barrier that wouldn’t allow anyone, but they’re friends, to use magic. I had a certain history with the Ancient race, so there was no easy way out.
When I started walking out of nowhere a woman came walking out the water in a blue silk dress that showed off her developed body. “Come now, Milo, don’t you recognize me?”
“Should I?” I asked trying not to stare.
“It’s your favorite demon dumbass,” she said looking disappointed.
“I thought you were a guy,” I said looking her up and down.
“No, I’m a girl. Demons aren’t born demons. They’re either created or born human and lose their soul, like you will when the King of Darkness kills you.”
“I see how much faith you have in me,” I said walking past her.
“You’re not going to ask for my name?” she said pouting.
“Do I care? Now, get us out of here,” I said.
“It’s Susan, thanks for asking. Hold on,” she said walking over to the water. She was quiet for a second and out of the water came a blue dragon.
“What’s up with demons and dragons?” I asked flipping on its back.
“What ever do you mean?” she asked floating onto its back.
“I summoned something that could fly and got a black dragon.” I said putting on my normal clothes over my armor.
“Be glad you didn’t get a small bird,” she said and the dragon took off before I was ready. I managed to grab its tail and climb back up. We flew for about an hour when we flew over a city. It was a big city. I didn’t recognize it until I saw the church in the middle of it.
“Hey, I got some business to take care of,” I said jumping off the dragon. I was falling pretty fast, faster than I expected, “Wings of darkness, help me catch the wind.” Two black angel wings came out my back and carried me down to safety. Once I landed they dispersed. I saw Susan still flying and wondered if she even cared. My answer came to be no.
I jumped off the roof of the building I was on into the market. If you wanted it the market had it. I once found a shrunken head. I walked down town and the person I was looking for found me. “Milo, I believe you owe me something,” said a deep voice from behind. When I turned around a tall, buff black haired man standing there looking down at me. I smirked; I knew what was going to happen.
“Hello, Jack. How’s Shelby? I heard she cheated on you again,” I said putting my hand behind my back.
“Go to hell,” he said rushing at me with his fist.
“I’ve been there. It’s a nice vacation. You should go,” I said punching him in his face before he realized what was going on. I jumped behind him and threw him into a pole. “You should really learn some manners.” He smiled and then started laughing. He stood up and started walking towards me. An arrow shot at my head, but I grabbed it and side stepped the second one. “Christine, it’s about damn time.”
I charged towards where the arrow came from, but two short blurs kicked me behind the knees. I fell over and they jumped on my back. “Hello, Milo. Remember us?” one said tightening the ropes that held my hands.
“You jerks,” I said and cut through it with darkness. I stood up and two halflings were standing behind me laughing.
“I would love to kill you, but I have to kill Christine first.”
“We know. We’re helping Christine.” One jumped at my face and the other at my stomach. I grabbed them both and threw them against a wall.
“Chains of Darkness come forth and imprison these fools.” Black chains held the two halflings to the wall. “I’ll come back for you guys.”
“You better, Milo.”
“Be right back.” I jumped on top of a building and looked for Christine. Of course she was no where to be found. “Eyes of the shadows show me what you see.” I searched for Christine’s shadow and found her running towards a tavern. “Won’t be that easy.” I jumped from building to building until I got to the tavern.
I jumped down and walked into the tavern and there was Christine in the corner. I walked over to her table and sat down. “Who’s the monkey with the bow?”
“He’s not a monkey. His name’s Robyn.”
“So he’s a bird?” At that remark he stood up with a sword to my neck.
“Try it, I dare you.” The sword was shaking and sweat rolled down his cheek. “You’re scared. There ‘s no way you’ll win against me.” He swung at my neck and I kicked the table at him and he fell over and the table followed. “I don’t think he likes me.” Christine jumped at me and succeeded, but I stabbed her in the leg with a small knife. “It’s poisoned.” Suddenly her eyes got big and she jumped up and I swung at her, but in an instant, was gone. I jumped back as she crashed into the floor and rocks and dust filled the room. When I reached for the table it was in pieces and Christine and Robyn were gone. “I should have known.”
I walked back to where Joey and Tony, the halflings, were chained up. Of course they were out of them, but they were waiting. “Shoe got away?” Tony asked eating a piece of bread. I could never tell Tony from Joey. They were twins and extremely skilled thieves. They were half my height with black hair and black eyes.
“She’s mastered a new skill and I wasn’t expecting it.” I said disappointed, “What’s up with Robyn?”
“I don’t know, apparently they’ve know each other for a long time.”
“Wonderful, give me a piece of that bread.”
“No, you want a piece, got steal one yourself,” Tony said taking a big bite of bread. I rolled my eyes and walked away. I found Jack an hour later at a restaurant with Shelby. Shelby had long, blonde hair and blue eyes and specialized in white magic. We were almost exact opposite, except that we both hated Jack. The only reason she didn’t leave him was because he is rich. I walked past the restaurant and to the inn. I got a room for the night and slept without any problems.
When I woke up the next morning and went down to get breakfast there was a group of bandits waiting for me. It wouldn’t have been any problem except I knew them. “Why’d you leave us?” said the tallest.
“Why’d you try to kill me?”
“Because you left us, Milo, have fun men,” Three jumped me and swung I blocked one and jumped over him, but there was another waiting for me. He swung at me and almost hit me. I jumped up to the roof and got shot at.
“Soldiers of darkness lend me your bodies.” Five dark masses rose from the floor and were shaped into soldiers. The bandits were no match for them and were easily slaughtered. Scratch, the leader, destroyed them all without breaking a sweat.
“You may have powers of darkness, but you yourself aren’t strong at all.”
“That’s why I have powers of darkness. Shadows jump me forward!” I jumped into a shadow and jumped out of Scratch’s and stabbed him in the back. “What’s the matter? I thought you said you could kill me.”
“You’re not you anymore,” he said coughing up blood, “You’re a demon of shadows.”
“Is that what everyone’s calling me?”
“Go to hell.” I pulled the katana out of his back and decapitated him. His head rolled on the floor and his blood joined the other’s blood in a pool in the middle of the inn. I walked out and Shelby was waiting for me.
“Powers that be, grant me the power to burn thy heathens.” A massive ball of fire erupted from her hands and shot at me. I threw a ball of darkness at it and they exploded between the both of us.
“Trying to kill me? Dark powers darker than night, come forth to grant me the power of destruction.” A massive ball of darkness formed above my head. I threw it at Shelby, but Susan stepped in.
“Come now, she doesn’t deserve that,” she said, “Besides we have work to do.”
“That can wait. I’m busy.”
“Fine, but I’ll be back.” She snapped her fingers and darkness enveloped her and she was gone.
“I’m sorry, where were we?” Shelby just shook her head and walked off. Susan appeared out of nowhere behind me.
“What’s up with her?”
“Go away.” I walked out of town and waiting for me was tony, Joey and Shelby.
“I don’t know where you’re going, but I have a feeling you’re going to die and I want to be the one who kills you,” Shelby said making Tony and Joey carry her things.
“I’m not saving you if you get stuck somewhere.”
“That’s why we’re here,” Tony and Joey said at the same time.
“Good luck you two,” I said walking past them. We walked for about an hour before Susan showed up on a dragon. She jumped off and the dragon flew off. We all kept walking without a word. She just rolled her eyes and followed. We all had no idea where we were going, but we were going to get there. We walked for three days before we came to civilization. About ten miles from it Robyn was waiting for us.
“Leave us be everyone, just go onto town and I’ll be there in a few,” I said giving Susan my stuff.
“Don’t get yourself killed,” Susan said.
“I’m already dead, remember?” I said drawing my katana. We waited until they were out of sight. “I hope you’re more of a challenge this time.”
“I’m not the one you’re fighting,” he said looking behind me. I turned to see Christine ready for a fight.
“Who hired you to kill me?” I lunged at her and she blocked with both swords.
“Our old master,” I said her in the eye, “You’ve been getting cocky and said some things that you shouldn’t have.” She jumped back and blocked my katana and swung at my other side with her other katana. I flipped over her and lunged for her back. She was gone in a instant and over me. I smiled and stepped out the way of her attack. I kicked her into a near by tree. Once the dust cleared she wasn’t there. For once she had surprised me. I jumped up in time for her to miss my back.
I landed on her blade and she swung with the other. I jumped to the side and lunged at her, she simply side stepped and swung down at me. In an instant I jumped to the side and cut for her neck, but was blocked. Robyn was coming out of the tree and blocked my katana. “This is between me and her,” I said jumping back a few feet.
“If you’re in a fair fight, then your tactics suck,” Robyn said going back into the tree. I blasted the tree a few times with a few blasts of darkness. The tree was gone and so were Christine and Robyn.
“What’s the matter? You two are scared of me? I thought I was going to die, but I guess I was wrong,” I screamed waiting for them to strike.
“They’re gone,” said Susan walking up from the path, “Their senses are great. They detected my presence before you did.”
“They ran from you.”
“I guess they know how powerful I am. They were watching when you made that scene in town.”
“Let’s go, I’m hungry.” I said walking towards town. What really made me question their strength was that I poisoned Christine, but she was moving fine. The poison was only one to make her sick, but there was no way she could get rid of it for about a week. Unless Robyn was keeping a secret from her and is a poison master, he was using druid spells. For those who don’t know druids are mages who use nature magics. Susan and I reached town in no time.
When we got there Shelby, Joey and Tony were waiting with food. We ate with barely a word. They didn’t ask about what happened with Robyn. I was glad they didn’t. I didn’t know what I was going to do next. I had two choices: go fight the King of Darkness and probably die or hunt down Christine. If I did find Christine I knew one of us would die and it probably wouldn’t be me. I hated not knowing what to do. Finally after dinner I asked Susan for her opinion.
“That’s up to you,” she said.
“Thanks a lot,” I said walking away. I walked around town to see if there was anything interesting. That’s when I ran into my sensei.

Chapter 2:

He and his new students had come to visit the dojo in the town and see if they’re skills rivaled anyone else’s. “What do you think, Milo?”
“I think they’re weak, Sensei. What kind of training have you been doing with them? Obviously not the same I did.”
“I’m not your sensei anymore. A few years after you left the dojo laws were past, because of the ‘cruel’ training the students were going through. So we had to stop.”
“You haven’t taught me everything, so yes, you are my Sensei. You know you’re just going to crush their spirits by coming here.”
“I will never teach you everything. I told them that winning is great, but losing teaches you how to win the next time.”
“Then, you will always be my sensei. There is no next time in life.”
“This is true, Milo,” he said sighing, “Did you finish the job?”
“Not yet, but soon.”
“You know what happens if you can’t finish the job. I’ll be forced to send done of my students after her.”
“You and I both know that they’ll be killed.”
“Then kill her,” he said coughing, “Before I have to.”
“You’re too old. Soon you will have to retire from the dojo.”
“Yes, my years are numbered, but so is everyone else’s.”
“You have a point, but don’t do anything too stupid.”
“Come with me to watch my students.”
“My pleasure, Sensei.” We walked into through the huge doors of the dojo. We were led into an arena and there were students fighting.
“Welcome to my humble dojo,” said Master Rai walking up. Rai was an old student of my sensei.
“It’s been a long time, Rai. I’m sure you remember Milo.”
“It’s been too long, Milo.” Rai said bowing.
“Maybe not long enough,” I said returning the favor.
“Shall we begin?” Sensei said sitting down.
“We may. Rina, begin the fighting.” A young girl wearing a kimono led the students down to the ring. They began and surprisingly Rai’s students were losing horribly.
“Rai, did you tell them to lose?” I asked watching the beat down.
“No. Sensei how have you been training them?”
“The same way as I taught you two, only problem is they aren’t tough. A few hits and they’ll go down.”
“I see, but why not train them the same way as us.”
“The mayor passed some laws saying we can’t, Rai.”
“Hey Rai, let’s see how good you’ve gotten.” At the same time Rai and I jumped down to the ring.
“Anytime you’re ready, Rai.” Rai charged at me and kicked my feet I jumped up and tried to kick his face but he dropped to his back. I dropped and used my weight to power my fist but he moved his head in the nick of time. He grabbed around my neck with his feet and flipped me and hit my head on the floor. I jumped off the ground using my hands and kicked at him. He grabbed my left and I kicked his face with the other foot. When he fell I dropped kicked him.
“I’m out,” Rai said getting up, “I never could beat you.”
“But you always did hurt me.” Blood flowed down my face. As I wrapped it up I told Sensei and Rai about what I had been up to since I left and my mission.
“Don’t screw up,” Rai said, “or you’ll be stuck in hell with us.”
“I’m going to hell no matter what I do. I just won’t be with the God of Darkness.”
“Maybe killing the king of darkness will repent your other sins,” Sensei said eating an egg roll.
“I’ll be one lucky man if it does,” I said finishing my rice.
“There is no such thing as luck,” Sensei said.
“Then what is it?” I asked.
“Someone likes you, I guess,” Rai said after Sensei stayed quiet.
“No one likes me. They always end up killing me.”
“How many times have you died, Milo?” Rai asked.
“I don’t know, but I think this one will be my last, I hope.” We talked for a good amount of time before I left. When I got back everyone was asleep. I curled up under the bed where Shelby was sleeping. I was sleeping pretty well until Susan woke me up. She decided that it would be funny to jump on the bed. I blew the bed and Susan up and went back to sleep. Then Susan started jumping on me. “Alright, alright, I’m up.”
“It’s about time. By the way Shelby, Tony and Joey were captured while they were in town.”
“YOU’RE TELLING ME THIS NOW? WHY DIDN”T YOU GO SAVE THEM?!”
“Why? They aren’t my friends.”
“Go back to hell.”
“Would if I could!” she yelled after me as I ran out.
“Powers of darkness grant me the tracks left by my enemies.” The footsteps and drag marks left by Shelby, Tony and Joey glowed black, but only though my eyes. I ran following the tracks. Judging by the tracks there’s about twelve of them maybe more, I thought to myself. As I was running, Rai jumped out from nowhere and followed me.
“I saw your friends get captured, but there was no way I was going to take them all myself,” he said. He looked fit for battle in his gold and black armor. He was tall and thick with black hair and blue eyes. We quickly reached the cave where the kidnappers were hidden. There were three guarding the entrance. “I’ve got these guys.”
Rai jumped to a near by tree and used his cloning technique and got them all at once. He gave me the thumbs up and we ran in sticking to the shadows. Within minutes we came to a fork in the path. “God of darkness grant me the power to see our allies.” Three green lights appeared down the left tunnel. “Follow me and stay close.” We ran for another few minutes until we came to the jails.
“That was too easy, Milo.” Rai said opening the jail doors freeing Christine, Joey and Tony.
“It’s a trap; they’re waiting for us in the front.” I said waking the three limp bodies up.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You wouldn’t have come.”
“You’re wrong. I’ve changed.”
“Prove it.” I said unlocking the handcuffs that held Tony. Rai used a hardening technique and made a hole through the roof. Tony and Joey jumped out and Shelby got on my back as I jumped out. “Don’t be stupid, Rai.”
Rai and I charged them all both using cloning technique. I took out all the small ones, but Rai killed the three big ones. “Still too easy” Rai yelled finishing off the last one. I rolled my eyes.
“Let’s get to town before it gets hard.” I yelled. We walked back to town and when we did get back it was dark. We stayed at the inn and fell asleep fast. When we woke up Joey and Tony were gone and left a note saying bye. Halfway through the day Jack came back for Shelby and they left so I was left with Susan. We continued walking towards the castle of darkness.

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