Anyone else dealing with stage fright?

Baby steps. Baby steps. After all, sometimes it's a piece of your soul your sharing. I'm sure there is a scene in your book that you're very proud of because the words just flow together so well--let her read that part if you feel comfortable. You can always explain the story around the scene so she'll have a reference point. It took me years to finally let my husband read my work. First, I let him read grad school essays, then a short story, then a longer one and so on. I'm still not real comfortable and I close all windows when any member of my family ventures near me and my PC when I'm writing. However, I am getting braver with time and I am able to discuss everything at length with my husband and occasionally my kids. Also, dh is great at editing and is very, very honest about my work, which helps because he won't tell me it's good when it's not or vice versa. So now when I say to my husband, "Would you read this?" he always asks, "Am I reading for content or grammer?"

I hope this helps and makes sense; if it doesn't, I apologize. I'm sleep deprived right now and I keep misspelling words and lacking clarity. I'm off to bed! Good luck!!!

That's a good idea, letting her maybe read a scene or two at first. I do trust her, I know she wont' tell me it's total crap, or anything. At worst she'll say "Well, it's a bit boring" or "it's not really my kind of thing" but it is embarassing to say the least, to think of her reading some of this. I'd sooner have a teacher read and edit my work than her, only because it scares me. I do need her editing skills though. Her and another friend of mine are who I will be asking to edit the final work after I finish MY edits. I want outside opinions to tell me if it's interesting or if I'm just biased because it's my baby :)

It's terrifying to me. Like, I don't know, handing someone my diary and saying, please, read it and evaluate my inner self. But i've decided that i'm going to get a couple online friends I know to help me edit it, which is easier to handle, and then i'm going to try and work up the nerve to give it to my fiance for a read.

Yeah. I think many people would agree that writing a novel is a very personal act, and you can learn a lot more about a person you know by reading what they write. I wonder what my lady will learn about me...

Repeat post. Sorry

Yes ! So far, none of my friends or parents even know I'm doing Nanowrimo, or that I like writing things. Someone in my life that I used to talk to, not really a friend though (someone who likes me way more than I like him) knows and is like stalking me trying to figure out the Genre, the name, the plot, wants a sample of the writing, and I just want to kill him.

I would rather die than hand anyone the manuscript of this book, because like someone said it's NOT supposed to be good. For instance, I forgot a secondary character's name and accidentally called him the wrong one for thirty pages, then switched back to the right one, and I keep forgetting the way people's houses, rooms, and faces look so my MC has had about three or four different hair colors.

But it's not that, it just feels so personal. I don't want to be judged on something (and they would judge it, everyone judges whether they want to or not) that I've worked so hard on, nor do I want people to think they find some of my experiences or something psychological about me in the book.

So yeah, I have huge stage fright.

Oh yeah, I totally hear you.

My husband asked me what I was writing and why I was so concerned about making it "good" (he thinks I could spit out any word 50,000 times to win).

This is how I look at it: If I died tomorrow, and someone found my novel (so far), I would be very embarassed to think that this would help formulate their last impression of me.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

Oh I hear you on the forgetting details part. I stopped referring to individual sailors by name because I had a terrible time remembering even the first mate's name from day to day. I figure I'll get it down basically enough like "The man with the red beard" and so on, and then later I'll stick them with names that I can remember.

I've told my friends who want to read it they can see it on Dec. 10th once I've taken out all the horrible parts that was just words for the sake of words.

My parents haven't quite gotten that I'm not writing something amazing, I'm just writing to get a first draft written then editing in December.

you should just let her read i'm letting my friend read mine

I let my boyfriend read my story when it was just 6k words, and oh man. I was freaking out. It was the first time ive ever let anyone read any of my stuff, and i felt as if my soul was naked.
he liked it, and wants to read it when its finished, but... eh. I dont know if i can deal with knowing someone read the entire thing. Its not a good novel. its just not.

Yeah, my friends and family want to read my book, and this kind of stage fight is a theme my story deals with, actually.

I think you should take a chance and let her read it C: She wants to find out more about you through your work. It could be good for you to see that you can be real with someone you love and that they won't reject you because of it.

Personally, I just want to put myself out there and say, "Yup, I wrote the whole darn thing. You're looking at my mind and a month of my time," even though it's got some flaws that bug me.
I used to be into art, and I -hated- to show people my sketches and things, but I've been getting over that. I want to own up to my work, whether it's good or not, because it's mine! Plus, I think that allowing myself to be put to the test is what's best for me right now, whether I measure up or not.

Good luck.

Oh man, I feel you. I have no problem putting mine up on my LJ, even when it included a freaking DANCE BREAK last year, but if anyone I know in person tries to read over my shoulder I go totally apeshit.

In any case, I like the idea of showing her scenes. And then after you clean up some of the major problems after November, let her read the whole thing and help you edit the less major problems if she wants. She gets to read it, you get help. Hooray?

Regardless of the quality of the work itself, I think it's important to try to distance yourself a bit from it. If you're thinking "it's my baby", of course it is going to feel uncomfortable when someone else reads it. If, on the other hand, you sort of shrug and wash your hands of it, like: "hey, the characters told their own story and did their own thing, I was just the enabler", it's easier IMO.

I finally took the leap of telling my family what I was doing on the PC so much but they seemed really uninterested and kept asking how I was meant to write a good one in just a month, so I told them that writing a really perfect novel isn't the point and they said

"Do you think JK Rowling was happy to write any old rubbish?"

What?
This is why I don't tell them things, they're definitely not going to be allowed to read it!

Anyway, I was always afraid too, and even now I show people and I'm sitting there with sweaty palms and a racing heart, trying not to watch their facial expression whilst they read it. I would say, show them the parts you care least about first, then it doesn't matter if they hate it (but chances are, if you show it to your friends they will love it).

I think any praise that you may get far outweighs the critics.

I'm glad to know I'm not the only one stressing about this. I definitely want some time to edit it before anyone but me looks at it, because honestly I've completely forgotten what some parts are about. You were right though that everythign that happens in this novel is not entirely my fault. Alex and James are as much to blame as me!!

Terrified to let people read it. I don't think its that bad, personally, but I have this feeling that by letting people read it that I would be giving them permission to tear it apart and critique it too much. I don't mind if they want to give me suggestions and tell me what's wrong with it, but they never seem to mention what they DID like, so that makes it feel like they hated the whole thing.

I'm thinking when all is said and done, I'm going to finish my own editing in December, then print out a hard copy and just pass it around to people, my girlfriend, a few friends, and the like, and let them write the heck all over it whatever they want. That way all the criticism is concentrated on one document that, if I so choose, I can burn and say "To heck with it."

I challenged all my friends and family to do it as well. So far, the closest competitor - and the only one with the courage to take up the challenge - has a couple thousand words.

So... as bad as my novel might be, hey, at least I did it... and my response can be, "Well, where's yours??"

I only last night told my mom...I think she was worried about me since I hadn't been writing emails and such recently...
I put it down that only she was to know and there was no way on earth anyone ws reading my baby and that it wasn't really good and no I'm not trying to publish it.

I'm terrified that someone will want to read it and I won't be able to say 'no.'
Stage fright, I haz it.

I sympathise completely!

For me, it's the opposite. I'm not worried about my friends, but out in public I might end up being like, the scorn of the entire world or something. I guess you never know until you try.

I'm furious on your behalf. I had to get up and fetch a glass of water, I was so angry after reading that. If someone said something like that to me I hope I'd -- well, for a start I hope I'd have the wit to turn to them and say, "Yes, it's called the end of Book Seven" -- but what I really hope is that I'd be able to find a coherent way to explain to them that they are ignorant of writing, they are ignorant of authorship, and if they seriously mean what they say -- if they're not just telling me silly things like this to wind me up for a stupid laugh -- then they are embarrassing themselves. "It's a first draft," I hope I'd say. "You idiots." Do I think JK Rowling was happy to get the first draft of Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone finished? Yes, I think she was probably delighted, no matter how "rubbish" it was. "Oh thank god!" she probably said to herself. "I did it! I've got the story in embryo!" Do I think that she redrafted it? Of course. Do I think that if she'd looked back on the first draft at the end of those other drafts she'd think that it was shaggy and awkward and full of holes? Yes. It was a first draft and she was a beginner author. I'd be surprised if it wasn't shaggy and holey.

Here. Googling 'rowling' and 'harry potter' and 'first draft' I found this:

And also this:

So by her standards, the first draft she wrote -- the equivalent, that is, of what you're writing now -- was "old rubbish."

That's funny. I had someone just today ask if anyone was going to be able to read this so called novel of mine once I'm finished writing it. I grew all read in the face and stuttered and stammered and made excuses as to why it wouldn't be ready for the viewing public, maybe ever!

Why not hand them the first chapter and say "Here, see if this is something you'd want to keep reading." If it's not, they have the opportunity to say "It's just not my kind of book" and save embarrassment on both sides.

Once you let them read one thing, then it's a piece of cake afterwards.. I first let my grandma take a stab at one of my unfinished manuscripts, she thought it was okay.. after that, some she really likes and wants to find out the rest of the story and some she doesn't care too much for. Whoever reads your stuff, will have his/her own opinion and you just have to not let it affect the writing, keep going in the direction of the story and don't let them change it.

If they dislike the ending, the plot etc. Don't change it, keep it the way it is..

Because it's your story, not theirs. Remember that.

And it's not so bad, you could always just let them read a page or two, nothing more, show them your favorite chapter or scene and let them wait for the rest until you're completely ready to give it to them.

My dad was at the book store and that day Orson Scott Card was giving a presentation. Afterwards he was able to talk to OSC and he asked a bunch of questions for me. You know what OSC said, he said to write, rewrite, and rewrite. My teacher also told this story. She was in college and had a paper due one day. The next day the teacher told them that all of it was rubbish and they needed to rewrite the essay. This kept up for a month before they actually got their papers back, graded. That day her college professor said that through that whole month he had not read a single word of any essay before he graded the papers. He said that all first drafts suck so keep reading and rewriting and it gets better with everyone. Same with novels. First drafts suck. Period. So keep rewriting till you think it's perfect and your not embarrassed to show it to people.
On the point of showing anyone your story it's okay to feel nervous. it takes guts to write a novel in one month but sharing it is completely different. As others have said take it slow. Don't get in over your head. But think of this too, reading or getting others opinions helps edit things that don't flow or make sense. Other's don't have to bash the writing they can help too,

I know exactly how you feel.
There are some people I know that I don't mind sharing it with. It's sci fi, and they appreciate sci fi. However, my sister, who doesn't read, and my mother, who reads murder mysteries... I'm nervous to share it with them, because they will think it is utter rubish, and why would anyone read anything sci fi, let alone write it? But I realize that, since I want to get it published, I will have to at some point let them read it, and my mom is an excellent editor, so why not sooner than later?

Jennifleur, I hope you take Frollostone's response on board.

Thanks.

--Phil.

I suppose what we need to keep in mind is that we should support ourselves the same way we support each other here on NaNoWriMo. Whenever someone has comment about their story being bad or "utter rubbish" everyone else has chimed in to say "at least it's there to be turned into something good!" because good isn't what we're after right now. But we don't apply that same ligic to ourselves much it seems. We need to tell OURSELVES that our stories will start out bad, just like everyone else's. But like we keep telling each other, it will improve if we work at it and then we shouldn't be afraid ot show people about it.

Though that doesn't stop the fearful little voice in my head...